wonderchild

How to tell a Neo-Soul Singer

posted Tue, 05-26-09

So I was on conference calls all day and I had on VH1 Soul Channel on mute.  If you don't watch this channel it is one of the best music channels on TV.  I can watch it all day.  They show a mix of new and old mostly R&B videos, live performances and specials on the history of R&B music in America.  Anyway, I guess I caught it on the "Neo-Soul Women" block because this is what every video looked like (told very tongue in cheek) for all of the Neo-Soul women singers

#1 You must have curly wild hair.  The longer and curlier and wilder, the more Afro cred.  However if you don't want to wear your hair out a big scarf wrap in an African print is an acceptable substitute. However at the climatic scene at the end of the video where you are singing into a mic in the middle of a smoky club, you will have your hair straightened in a 1940's wave.

#2 There is an 80% chance you will be mixed or on the lighter side.  Mixed could mean you are African & English, Cuban or something else.  The most well known exception to this rule is Erykah Badu, which leads into rule #3

#3 You must either have a name that is pronounced nothing like it is spelled (see Goapele) or rearrange your name to give you more cred - again Erykah Badu

#4 You must actually be able to sing.  All of the singers have voices ranging from decent enough to pretty good, but they all tend to have the same range.  There was no glass-shattering sopranos or CallingGodDownfromtheHeavens Altos.  Just good decent tunes

#5 Your video must have some sort of Zen-like quality either through the song name (featherlight) or video imagery (waterfalls, children laughing etc.)

#6 The only guest rappers you are allowed to have are Common and/or the Roots.  

Did I miss any others?

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1. Sweethoney left...
Sat, 07-18-09 11:49 am

#7 You have to have some reference to soul food in you song lyrics

#8 You would have to be riding some sort of bicycle in you video